Do you enjoy the holidays?

By: Samantha S. Daviss

I had a girlfriend ask me a very profound question the other day, which has actually never been asked of me before; yet it is something that has always rattled around in the back of my brain.

She asked me if I was looking forward to the holidays. I sat there, hesitated, and thought long and hard before I answered her. My answer was probably more than she wanted to hear, but it made me think. I felt like the biggest Scrooge/Ba-hum-bugger on the planet. She probably thought I was crazy. Because most people jump up and down with excitement over the thought of the holidays.

But, I answered her with a simple answer—

“Once I get in gear, get my decorations up, and the presents under the tree; I definitely love and enjoy the holidays.”

I love seeing the holidays through my kids’ eyes, and now that they are all a little bit older; they get it, so they are super excited for Santa and all the festivities.

I think I hesitated because I always feel like there is so much hype with the holidays, a lot of chaos, and piling up of bills. Sometimes I feel like the real reason for the season is forgotten and overlooked. I want my kids to understand that Christmas is about the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ, and about being with family and friends, and just spending time together and enjoying one another.

Another reason I hesitated is because over the years the dynamics of friends and family have changed in my life. I have lost loved ones and that makes a huge difference in how you celebrate the holidays. 

 I know that is life, I am getting older, and I will lose grandparents and loved ones along the way; but again, the holidays are all those I love coming together to enjoy one another, and when some of them aren’t there any more…it just lives that void that is unfillable.

But with all that being said, I really do love the holidays. Like I said, once I get my rear in gear and get my decorations up, get the presents bought and wrapped, and start celebrating with parties or “get togethers” with friends and family; then I am definitely a holiday junky.

But when my girlfriend asked that question such a weight of guilt has been heavy on my shoulders. Was I too honest with her? Did I tell her more than she really wanted to hear? Probably, but the fact of the matter is…I was honest. Maybe too honest, but honest nonetheless.

To be human is to feel and to love, right? So I guess I am human. I feel the loss of those from my past, I feel the anxiety of getting everything done in a timely manner, and I feel apprehensive about creating the perfect holiday memories for my kids—after all these are things they will carry with them for the rest of their lives.

So, I think it is okay, if you have that deep down feeling of disquiet towards the holidays. Maybe an incident happened in your past, or you don’t have very good childhood memories, or you’ve lost someone that made your holidays worth celebrating; but regardless, just remember that the future is filled with sunshine and laughter, and the past is the past.

Some folks aren’t meant to be that jolly little elf, and some like myself, require a little motivation, like my house looking like the inside of a gingerbread house, to kick that true holiday spirit into another gear.

Being honest to yourself and others isn’t a bad thing. It may come as a surprise to yourself or others when spoken out loud…but I always say, laughter and honesty are the best medicine.