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Tuesday, January 21, 2014

What Doesn’t Kill Us Makes Us Stronger


By: Samantha S. Daviss

 

So many things happen in life that can tear someone down mentally, emotionally, or physically. But you have to remember, you are who you are because you must believe in yourself, your way of doing things, and be confident in your adaptation of living life.

We are all like snowflakes, not one single person is the same as another. Even our children vary from us. We are total and complete individuals created by a greater power beyond our own knowledge and strength; a power more prevailing than any we could fathom. But what we must continue to remind ourselves is that we are strong independent people that must live our lives in our own ways.

Following others just to feel complete or confident about yourself is not a healthy way to live life. Be true to who you are and follow the path you were pre-destined to travel down. There will be so many things that happen to you in your lifetime…good, bad or ugly…but you have to be a strong enough and confident enough person to endure them, and don’t let them bring you down. Don’t allow the heavy things in life apply such a burden to your shoulders that it turns you in to a miserable person.

Have no doubt that it may take some time to work through them all, some soul searching, some self-reflection…but just because one (or numerous) people (or events) do something that harms you, bruises your ego, or damages your reputation in anyway…doesn’t give them the upper hand.

I have had my fair share of trials and tribulations that I have overcome in my life. Like I have always said…if that situation, person, or event harms me so deeply that it actually takes my smile away permanently then they (or it) has won! And I have stood true to myself that no one, or nothing, will be so powerful that it will ever take my smile away from me.

I want to stand strong, show my children that you must believe in yourself, have pride in yourself, and know that you can overcome anything that life has dealt you. I have learned, that even though I need my friends and my family; they make me a better person, they make me the person I want to stay true to. The only way I can stay true to myself is by being comfortable in my own skin.

And by doing that, I have to spend a lot of time alone with myself. Or at least try to carve out some “me time”. I have to stay in touch with who I am, not what my group wants me to be, or what I think my group needs me to be; but to be me.

I am confident that if I know who I am, fight for my goals, live up to my aspirations in life, and I am in touch with the core of my very own soul…no one (or nothing) can take me down. So with all the hills and valleys that I have encountered in my life through friendships, relationships, family, jobs, and so many other things…I have stayed true to myself; and I know for a fact that is how I have managed to overcome, persevere, and survive some of the events that have made me fall to my knees in tears.

It’s okay to be weak, it’s okay to be vulnerable, and it’s okay to reach out to those near you; but just remember, at the end of the day, you have to be a strong enough person to be able to pull your own self up by your boot straps and move on. In the end, it is all up to you.

So allow those around you to live their lives their way, but you stay true to who you are and live your life on your own path – and know that the path you have chosen is a positive path, will not hurt anyone that may cross your path, and at the end of the day you are comfortable with the choices you made for yourself or those around you.

Never let them (or it) take your smile away…What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger…I promise, I am living proof.

That’s Normal, Right?


By: Samantha S. Daviss

 

Flying to the wrong state. Being told you aren’t checked all the way through to your final destination, renting a car and driving across the entire state of Kansas is normal, right?

That’s how everyone travels these days isn’t it? I don’t think our family would know what to do if things went smoothly and easily. I feel like I could write an entire book just on our adventures and day to day antics alone.

So over the holidays we embarked on another adventure to the slopes, to enjoy a few days of relaxation with our family and friends. Enjoy the cool weather of the Rocky Mountains, and put our downhill skiing skills to the test once more.

On the way getting there was the real adventure, though. You would think packing bags, driving to the airport, and getting on a plane would be easy; but for our family it’s not. It’s a really a long and convoluted reason how this happened, but the short version is that two of our family member’s tickets weren’t checked all the way through to Denver. We had a stop-over in Kansas City, Missouri. And I am sure Missouri is lovely this time of year, but to be honest, I had no interest in spending any time there.

Once we found out (upon arrival in Kansas City) that the agent in Dallas hadn’t done their job properly and two members weren’t checked all the way through, even though our bags were; there were no more flights out of Kansas City for the rest of the day to Denver.

So thinking fairly quickly, while still in a bit of shock, my husband and I started calling other airlines, and when we turned the short end of that stick up…we looked at one another and said…”Shall we drive?”

Needless to say, my husband, and the two older boys went to the rental car office, got us a car; while the baby and I collected all the luggage, changed a dirty diaper in the middle of the airport, and waited for the three men to return with our chariot to carry us across the Land of Oz.

Being used to a three row SUV on a daily basis, we crammed all of our luggage in the very back cargo bay area, while the three boys (which included a huge car seat, a booster seat, and a very scrunched up pre-teen) shared the back seat.

And off we went. Ten hours and counting.

Now if you know anything about geography, we only spent about 30 minutes in the state of Missouri, but about eight hours in the state of Kansas, and another two to two and a half getting to our destination in Colorado.

During the course of the drive, I think I managed to come up with every foul mouthed word to throw at Dorothy, Toto, the Tin Man, the Cowardly Lion, and the Scarecrow. Kansas was not my most favorite place in the world at the time. But I must say, on an average day, it is an absolute struggle to drive from Corsicana to Dallas with my boys, without one of them ripping the other’s arm off, or a screaming match ensuing in the back seat.

But this “little adventure” across the prairie lands of the good ol’ USA; our boys were absolute angels. It’s almost as if they knew Mommy and Daddy’s rapidly fraying ropes, were not only frayed but they had caught on fire, and were flaming out like gasoline doused torches.

We made a few side highway stops for potty breaks and dirty diapers; a big stop for dinner, but all in all it was pretty “trauma free”. We were all a little more crowded than we would have been on the airplane…but nonetheless, we were together, suffering together, and making the best of it. We played car games, we laughed, we napped, and we made it there safely…so I would say it was a successful adventure[S1] .


 [S1]

Thursday, January 9, 2014

Life is one big Cliché


By: Samantha S. Daviss

 

You know it’s funny you hear all of life’s little clichés of how to live a longer, happier, more fulfilling life.

“Live life to its fullest.”

“Live each day like it’s your last.”

“Never go to bed angry.”

“Always tell those closest to you how much they mean to you.”

 

Well this past weekend, made all those phrases come to fruition for me. It really was just a normal average weekend; the two babies and I dropped off their older brother at a friend’s [house] for a sleepover, then we went to run some errands in Waxahachie. When we finished we headed home to meet one of my girlfriends and her son at the park to play and enjoy the fleeting time we had with the warm weather and sunshine.

Soon after the park we headed home to play at our house and let the kids ride bikes until the sun set. As we were just about to head into the house, I received a phone call from the parents where my oldest was sleeping over…I knew something was wrong because these parents never call when they have my son. I trust them implicitly and I know he is in good hands.

Now bear in mind this is a house full of boys and the neighborhood is filled with boys so there have been a fair share of minor accidents, broken bones, and burns that have occurred while this rowdy group of boys has played together. So when I answered the phone, I answered with a simple…”Let me guess, he broke his arm.” The dad on the other end was stunned that I knew what had happened. He answered in amazement that my son had in fact broken his arm, from a trampoline incident. My son juked, when he should have jived and apparently the ground won.

So I of course jumped in the car to go grab my baby boy and take him to the emergency room and get him put back together, just like Humpty Dumpty. Amazingly, I was fairly calm, of course my adrenaline was pumping, because what good mom’s adrenaline wouldn’t kick into overdrive when she hears her baby is hurt? On my way to get him the sun had completely set, so it went from dusk to dark in a matter of moments. As I was approaching my meeting spot with the other parents, who live a little outside of town, I saw this image appear out of the corner of my left eye; it wasn’t until the figure was right in front of my car that I realized it was a pretty good sized  doe.

It all happened in an instant. They say things that happen in life, happen in a flash, and you really don’t realize they are happening, and it is so true. Sadly that poor doe didn’t have a chance with my SUV, but in opposition, she did some serious damage to my car too. It was completely un-drivable, with a steaming radiator and all, so I pulled over to the side of the road and the other parent swung around to pick me up to drive both my son and myself to the Emergency Room. I wasn’t hurt, I just obviously, now needed a ride to the ER with my son.

So off we went, for yet another visit to our local ER for one of my crazy boys. They did a fabulous job tending to him, all went smoothly and well for us, and we walked out all intact, and heavy one broken arm and cast.

After we returned home, and I got everyone in bed, and the house was calm again and things were back to normal (relatively speaking for our household); I laid in bed and started to play back the events of the day, thinking how simple it all started out, running errands when it rapidly took a turn for the worse. The realization of how fortunate we were began to hit me as I laid in bed next to my husband holding his hand. Grateful that a broken arm and a smashed radiator is all we had to contend with.

All of those clichés of how to enjoy life came rushing into my mind realizing that my car wreck could have ended so much worse. I could have swerved and hit a pole, or cut too hard and rolled my car; my son could have landed on his head and broken his neck or given himself a severe concussion. So “living each day to its fullest”, “enjoying every moment”, and “living with no regrets” isn’t such bad advice after all; but as they say life can change in an instant.

My family was lucky, but we all need to sit back and realize just how quickly our lives can change. Be thankful for what you have, don’t sweat the small stuff, and find humor in it all.

After it was all said and done, my girlfriend told me that she wasn’t sure she could continue being my friend; she said being me was too exhausting. I giggled, and couldn’t have agreed more. And so you see, after the fear of our what-could-have-been accidents passed us by, I sat back and laughed at how true her statement was…that our lives are in constant motion, and I am really not sure what I would do if I ever got to sit still if even for a moment.

Pull those you love just a little closer to you today, and realize just how lucky you are that they are in your lives, safe and sound…because things could change in an instant.